Growing up in the south, the holidays were always a cookie-cutter fit, almost something right out of a Hallmark film. But they always looked a little different to me. I grew up under the traditions of my mom and my dad’s culture. While my dad grew up with commercialized Christmases, my mom grew up the complete opposite: Jewish, celebrating Hanukkah.
When my parents began the conversation of raising my brother and me, they were constantly asked which side they were going to choose. When they stated that they planned to cultivate us under both cultures, they were faced with backlash and criticism. People were concerned about the confusion it might cause and the questions we may receive. Even though the idea of celebrating two polar opposite holidays may seem like chaos, in reality, it was one of my favorite times of the year. I had the ability to experience and learn from both sides of my culture in one season.
One of my favorite things about both holidays being adjacent is the opportunity to mash the customs together to make new traditions specific to my own family. If someone were to step foot into my house in December, the decorations would be all over the place. Turn one way, and the sight would be a huge table covered in my mom’s extensive collection of Menorahs (the candle holder used during Hanukkah), lights in the shape of the Star of David, and dreidels (the spinning tops used to play a fun game around Hanukkah). Turn the other direction to see my family’s huge Christmas tree decorated lavishly with childhood ornaments and family memorabilia. Even the outside of my house might be considered “blended.” The yard is loaded with inflatables, including a small snowman dressed as a rabbi. On the back porch, there is a white Christmas tree with blue and silver ornaments, which we call our Hanukkah tree.
Decorations aren’t the only thing that are melded together during this time. The celebration of the holidays themselves also looks unique for my family. For Hanukkah, we typically get together on the final day of the holiday with the extended family on my mom’s side. We all wear pajama pants because that was what my grandmother “Savta” would always get us. To signify the oil traditions, we ordered Canes or Popeyes in, instead of cooking because she hated the smell of fried food in her house. Just as the way I celebrate Hanukkah isn’t typical, neither is the way I celebrate Christmas. It has recently become a tradition that I spend time with my dad’s side on Christmas Eve, so I am able to celebrate Christmas Day with just my immediate family. While the morning is typical, the rest of the day is not. We choose to spend our time watching movies at the movie theaters and eating at Chinese restaurants.
Though I have received many questions over the years about how I juggle two religions, I have taken the opportunity to teach others. Ever since I was really young, I have found joy in educating others on both sides of my culture. In elementary school, which was Catholic, my “Savta” would come around the holiday season to teach my classmates about Hanukkah. Being able to share my traditions with the people I was close to helped me find reassurance in my own values. Instead of focusing on the differences we had, we were able to look past them and just enjoy the time with each other. That is truly what the holidays are about.
